Query Capital Money Musings Newsletter: July 2024
In a little village in Myanmar, monks in maroon robes walk down the street with bowls in hand to gather alms. Villagers make food and scoop rice into their bowls. The relationship between the monks and the “householders”, or laypeople, is symbiotic despite very different lives on their face. Monks are to own nothing, owe nothing, and dedicate their lives to spiritual ends. Householders engage in commerce and support the monastics.
I see the queer pursuit of social justice to be a religious dedication, though not in name. The message is to create a just world, punish selfishness, and champion the oppressed. It might be hard for people outside of our world to even understand why I, a (queer) financial planner, might struggle with the idea that individuals should build wealth at all when need in the world is so great.
I know many people feel at ease with the money they or their ancestors accumulated, or believe that money is not a zero sum game, or look forward to enlarging the “pie” regardless of the difference in “slice” size. Many people feel comfortable with some middle amount of money that does not erase the difference between them and others. But many of us feel deep discomfort with inequality for its own sake, regardless of its cause or impact.
The Future is Expensive
As an advisor, care and affection grows spontaneously from knowing and supporting my clients. I want them to build wealth because I want them to be okay. I want them to be able to take care of themselves and their people, to have the lives they dream of, to one day age in comfort. And as a person whose fate and loyalty is entwined with the queer community, I want us to have a future, to have financial stability which supports our emotional and social stability, and to age as a people in comfort.
This future that I advocate for isn’t free. It takes more money than you might think to live on your savings for 30+ years. When I show people projections of future wealth based on their income, savings, and goals, many people are shocked to see future balances in the millions of dollars. Why would you ever need millions of dollars?
You don’t need millions of dollars - but you do need money to buy food, shelter, rest, and the little pleasures in life. And maintaining your life, when you do not or cannot work anymore, generally requires a large balance that is at least semi self-perpetuating. These balances of wealth are at the mercy of the stock market with unknown future returns. In order to counterbalance that uncertainty, we would generally encourage clients to overshoot what they would need in a perfect world.
What Would Jesus Redistribute?
A radical financial advisor I know helps wealthy young people give away their wealth. She said to me, “How can we do financial planning when the world is on fire?” These gifts are financial planning in the sense that “success in retirement” requires an inhabitable earth, etc. Yes, and - I see people who did give away all their money as wealthy young people who now are having a pretty rough go of it on an individual level.
Jesus said to the rich young man, “Go, sell everything you have and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me… It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for someone who is rich to enter the kingdom of God.” But it’s easy for Jesus to say because he knows that the “time horizon” of his financial plan is only 33 years, and he can make as many loaves and fishes as he wants.
After all, who has the money to build the manger for another to begin a life of devotion? Are these lives in opposition to one another?
Live Your True Calling!
When a client is giving away everything, this is a conversation that we have. I get it and I love that in you. I am struck by the beauty of the lives lived with an open hand with no consideration for oneself. If every person is truly equal in the eyes of the ultimate, why should you not live in poverty while the world lives in poverty? I think this kind of abandon lives very close to the truth.
Something does get stuck when we can’t quite live the life of a householder, which involves saving and owning and keeping something for ourselves. So we dissociate and self-sabotage. For instance you might be ignoring your financial advisor’s emails because you hired him for the express purpose of accountability in keeping an emergency fund, worked hard to save it up, and then gave it away and overdrafted your account. We can strategize until kingdom come, but are you really willing to have money?
On the other hand, is self-sacrifice your true calling? If it is, let’s really do this. Let’s cast out self-shame and explore the options intentionally. For example, if you have a sum of money that is rapidly dwindling, we might discuss when we expect it to deplete, and what your standard of living will be like afterwards. What does it look like to have nothing now? What does it look like to have nothing in old age? If you don’t have clarity, you can’t consent to the financial situation that you are opting into.
Feelings Are Forever, But You Are Free
If you decide to be a householder then you may have to concede that your acts of generosity may always feel incomplete. I may always feel ashamed when I give, knowing that I held something back. But I feel into the ways that I support others and try to leave things better than I found them. And I own the choice to live this life and not another, so I can focus on my intentions without getting in my own way.
And I say to you, you are a person and you matter. You are free. You can create the life that you want, whether it means ease or sacrifice.
A note on our theme of tithing:
I think an ongoing practice of giving a percentage of your income is a way to embody this symbiosis; as I receive, so do others receive. Reflecting on this as you pay taxes is also nice.
It’s also good to have a handle on how much you actually need in the long run, so that you don’t end up keeping vastly more than you could ever need for yourself.
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